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#48263 by philbymon
Tue Dec 02, 2008 7:23 pm
What's the worst Xmas song ever, in your opinion? You know you're gonna hear it to death over the next month or so, so just let it all out right here!

My dad really hated "The Little Drummer Boy."

The one that gets me every frikken year is that damned John Denver "Please Daddy don't get drunk this Christmas" song. Makes me wanna get drunk, it does!

Never liked that dratted Springsteen thing, either.

I feel like a Grinchy guy whenever I hear Xmas carols!

#48265 by Micawber
Tue Dec 02, 2008 7:45 pm
Just about all of them especially Im dreaming of a white christmas.
Although I will leave myself wideopen for abuse by admitting that Greg lakes I believe in father christmas allways sent a tingle down my spine as a young un, as did Chris De Burghs A Spaceman Came Travelling :oops:

#48267 by philbymon
Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:11 pm
I like using alternative words whenever possible -

"We wish you and Mary syphlus & a clappy New Year!" (w/apologies to Black57 - I didn't write that one!) - to the tune of we wish you a merry Xmas

"Good king Wenceslas looked down & saw his little dingle.
Rubbed Ben Gay all 'round his crotch. Then his loins did tingle" - obvious

"My pants are a sight. One holey fright.
Way too tight. My package in sight.
'Round the back there's rips in my seat.
Pockets flap & my butt feels the breeze.
Oh my sartorial woes!
I think my danglies just froze." - to the tune of Silent Night

"Tingling feet tingling feet
Diabetes sucks!
Every step just feels like heck
My circulation's stuck. HEY!" - to the tune of jingle bells

"Got my bra & my panties
And this girrrrrrdle's a dandy.
I'm strollin' along, my leg hair's too long.
Walking 'round in women's underwear" - obvious

"Chester's cooking on an open fire.
Sits there picking at his nose." - obvious

"Shiv'rin' hell...shiv'rin' hell
It's wintertime in the city." - to the tune of Silver Bells

"Busted well, busted well, busted well pump
I got no water, & smell like a skunk" - to the tune of Jingle Bell Rock

"Boys in the 'hood with pants half down,
Their boxers way up high.
The hip hop's way too loud.
They walk around so proud.
You'd think they'd pull them up.
You'd think they'd trip & cuss
When they're walking around with pants half down." - to the tune of Joy TO The World

"These three sing, though corpulent are.
Voices ring they're sure tenor stars.
Just keep them away from the buffet
Or there'll be naught left that's ours." - to the tune of "We 3 Kings"

"Oh come to the tavern.
Let's get blinding drunk.
Let's drink 'til we stink from the brew coming through our pores.
We'll have another and maybe several others
And then we'll all drive home
While slurring on cell phones
And wake up in the hospital with broken bones" - to the tune of "Oh Come All Ye Faithful"

#48298 by Andragon
Wed Dec 03, 2008 1:28 am
Phil, that's some funny shyt.
Bout your question: pretty much all of em :P
Except for this one cover:
!!!LINK!!!

#48316 by Black57
Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:39 am
I enjoy Christmas music. Not the fluffy ho ho stuff. I like to here it twisted. I prefer jazzier versions. The songs lend room for so many musical influences. I gave my hubby a metal version of Xmas tunes that I think that I play them more than he. Dave Bruebeck does a really cook version of We Three Kings in 5/5 time. Vince Guaraldi's Christmas Time Is Here and Linus and Lucy just kicks butt. I'm just sayin'...

#48319 by ZXYZ
Wed Dec 03, 2008 4:15 am
This guy at work gave me a C'mas CD with "Walkin 'round in womens underwear" and " I AM SANTA CLAUS"- to the tune of Ozzys Iron Man - funny as hll sht I wish I could upload and share it..(if I could still find it..-probly around here somewhere)

#48320 by gbheil
Wed Dec 03, 2008 4:27 am
Man I love Christmas. I love all the old Christmas tunes. My mom had some LPs. Bing Crosby was one the other was Jim Neighbors. She played them every year.
I cannot sing Silent Night to this day in the candlelight service without tears in my eyes.

The ones I cant stomach are the Santa Claus / Rudolph kind.
Although I grew up watching those shows on the boob tube, we were taught early on the real meaning of CHRISTmas.

#48329 by repressthecadence
Wed Dec 03, 2008 5:58 am
Even with that knowledge of Christmas's meaning, I feel we've really blown the self-centered idea of receiving gifts way out of proportion. The example we're supposed to be remembering is cheerful giving, afterall. I love the real Christmas songs, but not that Santa Claus bullocks.

#48341 by Paleopete
Wed Dec 03, 2008 1:58 pm
I'm sick of all of 'em. A couple of the newer ones are good, especially the Greg Lake "Father Christmas" song (whatever the correct name is...) always did like that one. John Lennon wrote one, pretty good, but has been played to death, I'm not quite sick of it yet but close. Instrumental versions of Little Drummer Boy are sometimes good, but that's about the only "traditional" one I can tolerate more than once a decade...

I want to absolutely scream when I walk in a store and hear the same old crap every year...if I never even hear Bing Crosby's name again I'd love it...I think White Christmas is the one I hate the most, and the one that irritating woman sings, don't remember the song or her name...deck the halls with boughs of ho-olly...YUKKK!!! And don't get me started on the elvis Presley ones...

I feel we've really blown the self-centered idea of receiving gifts way out of proportion.


Very true.

Christmas is NOT what it once was. Decorations have been in the stores since before Halloween, advertising is now nothing but christmas, it's all about "what are you gonna get me?". The money to be made has ruined it long ago. Nothing but a profitable commercial venture now, and that sucks.

I get depressed every year, my sister walked out the back door and found me standing in the yard crying about 10 years ago for no reason. Greedy corporations have made it a really maddening thing, their advertising is designed to make you think you have to buy everything on the shelf, and many people go way overboard on the credit cards, then spend 6 months trying to pay it all back.

And then you have to listen to that stupid, worn out Bing Crosby song everywhere you go...Stop this ride I want off...

#48346 by repressthecadence
Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:19 pm
A man was killed on Black Friday by a horde of shoppers who busted down a door at Wal-Mart. He was trampled to DEATH, and the people weren't even upset about him dying, but rather that they couldn't get their shopping done.

But back to Christmas songs, the Trans-Siberian Orchestra's stuff is pretty quality. Despite its age and ridiculous overplaying, it's still pretty impressive.

#48357 by Kramerguy
Wed Dec 03, 2008 3:59 pm
I always liked the south park xmas cd the best as far as parodies go. The worst xmas song to me is that crappy spanish/mexican one that sounds something like "halik mali dah" or some sh*t.

It drives me batty.

#48363 by repressthecadence
Wed Dec 03, 2008 4:42 pm
LOLOL "Feliz Navidad"?

Yeah, that is a pretty annoying song.

#48369 by Black57
Wed Dec 03, 2008 7:30 pm
josh_back wrote:man! i love a lot of christmas tunes.
especially carol of the bells, that song is great.
go search the trans-siberian orchestra's version of carol of the bells, you won't be disappointed!

i'd link u but i'm at work :(


Yeah, Carol of The Bells is so cool and it is such a simple tune.

#48374 by philbymon
Wed Dec 03, 2008 7:55 pm
I took a poll at the bar last night & the top 3 hated tunes were -

#3) ANYTHING by the Chipmunks

#2) the barking dogs doing Jingle Bells

#1) "Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer"

I think I prolly told this to ya before, but what the heck, I'll tell it again -

Years ago, one of my aunts had a horrible accident with a riding mower, as in it rolled over on her & killed her. The very next family reunion was the 1st I'd attended in about 10-15 yrs, & my relatives asked me to play & sing, so I dug out the acoustic & sat there with only one song on my mind -


"My aunt got run over by a John Deere"

All I could do was grin like a silly buffoon, & ppl kept asking me what was so funny, & I couldn't say anything, cuz it was just so sick, since the incident had only happened like a month before the reunion. She was a favorite relative, too, but I just couldn't stop thinking about it. I played about 4 songs & put the damned thing away before I let it out of me & ruined everything.

Damn I hate the way my head works sometimes!

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