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#212155 by CliffordN25
Tue Apr 16, 2013 6:37 pm
Hi, I am a 29 year old guy, who's looking for a casual guy friend around the same age who just happens to enjoy playing some great pop and soft rock songs from the 80s to the present, but who can help me move beyond that and as a friend, show me how to do multi-track mixing and recording, and songwriting. Keep in mind that I'm only looking for a best friend, not to make money or be popular.

The places that I've tried in the past, whenever I got a response, it was from someone who played guitar, or drums, and someone who is currently committed to playing in a band, or someone who actually works as a music producer, or I'd run into guys who's tastes in music were very narrow, usually limited to classic rock, metal or alternative. These places include Baton Rouge Rocks, Craigslist and of course, posting ads at a local store called Guitar Center.

I have also tried searching at church, and kept coming across musicians who said no to any secular pop and soft rock music, but loved Christian contemporary. I never once came across someone who was attending the church temporarily, to find what I was looking for.

So, I currently don't have a good way to talk with musicians in my area and continue my search effectively.

Can someone please help me get back on track? Are there any other sites similar to this one where I can create a profile, AND talk with other people on a forum? Are there any other music stores in Baton Rouge where I can place ads on a bulletin board, because that also seems to be part of the problem: not having enough places to get the word the out, while at the same time keeping a low profile.

Keep in mind that I wouldn't mind reaching a couple of individuals in Baton Rouge that play in bands, or that teach music or who work in music, but only for networking purposes. I don't understand why, but whenever I would bring that up on Baton Rouge Rocks, or to a person who responded to my ad who I didn't want to continue down a music path with, but wanted to keep as a general friend, and meet other friends through, those individuals would be really spiteful about it.

#212163 by GuitarMikeB
Tue Apr 16, 2013 7:20 pm
OMFG! :shock: Back again with the same old pleading... :roll:

#212167 by CliffordN25
Tue Apr 16, 2013 7:27 pm
GuitarMikeB wrote:OMFG! :shock: Back again with the same old pleading... :roll:


If what I'm doing bothers you, I'm sorry, deal with it. I'm a complainer, but at the same time, someone who is NOT afraid to ask for help. I'm not pleading. I am simply recounting the real problems I've been having in my search, and trying to reach some people on here who can help me rectify those problems, and therefore, help me to more effectively reach my target audience, which includes having in depth dsicussions about other websites similar to this one where I can get the word out, and helping me learn about other pop and soft rock projects in the Baton Rouge area.

So far, the advice I've recieved in the past on this site, and on sites like Baton Rouge Rocks and Craigslist is too general for me to do anything with, or is something suggested by someone who hasn't even tried the suggestion himself, and thus cannot provide any in depth advice on how to effectively make use of the suggestion in order to effectively find this special guy keyboard player. Or the advice is given by someone who is a badass rocker who has played in a bunch of bands, and thinks he's a big shot, and goes to bars regularly to get drunk with his friends, and therefore doens't have a clue about the audience that likes good quality pop and soft rock music, and instead makes fun of it, and calls it crap, or gay.

Then you have the people who seem to give advice, when later I find out that they are joking around.

Also on Baton Rouge Rocks, and this site, I tend to come across a lot of guys who post and run, rather than reaching people who are smart enough to stick around for a more intimate discussion.

#212178 by CliffordN25
Tue Apr 16, 2013 8:51 pm
So now with all of that out of the way, can someone please help me out? Remember, in order to find this guy, I need to have access to a wider variety of sites like this where I can create a profile, and post some videos of what I play, but at the same time, connect with guys around my age who share my passion for playing pop and soft rock, and make some reliable connections. In the past, a lot of the people who said they'd ask around, ended up being complete duds due to the fact that they weren't around the audience I'm trying to reach.

Also you have to be patient and work with me. If I tell you that I can't or don't want to carry out your suggestion, I have a good reason for it. I'm not the kind of guy who makes excuses. Also it helps to discuss how to make use of the given suggestion to effectively reach my target audience.

#212239 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 4:59 pm
Now, with that out of the way, are there any great guys on here who can help me expand my advertising horizons? I need something new to try.

#212256 by PaperDog
Wed Apr 17, 2013 6:09 pm
CliffordN25 wrote:Now, with that out of the way, are there any great guys on here who can help me expand my advertising horizons? I need something new to try.


yOU AGAIN! ohHHHH nOOOOOOOOOOOO!

#212258 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 6:15 pm
PaperDog wrote:
CliffordN25 wrote:Now, with that out of the way, are there any great guys on here who can help me expand my advertising horizons? I need something new to try.


yOU AGAIN! ohHHHH nOOOOOOOOOOOO!


What did I tell you? If you are annoyed by my posts, DEAL with it witout expressing your anger or feeling the need to make fun of the person. And again, before responding, read my profile, and check to see if you have similar music tastes and goals. I have been running into way too many individuals like this, and it's getting lame.

And here's something I truly don't understand. Whenever I point out some solutions that can help solve the problem, like networking, or expanding the number of places where I can advertise, I'm treated like dirt.

#212264 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 6:46 pm
And here's another thing I don't understand. No matter where (online or a printed version) I post a request (with detailed information) I still reach individuals who give the impression that they were rushing around when they responded, and thus didn't read the ad in full. Usually, it will be soemone who wants to invite me to play in their band, or someone who wants to hire me, when I clearly state in the ad that what I'm looking for a friend, and that I'm looking for ONE person.

Another thing that I do in most of my ads is list some of the key artists in pop and soft rock, but a lot of people read that as influences, rather than artists I cover, or I reach someone who plays heavy metal, or hard rock, and didn't have enough sense to sample some of those artists to see if that person has a passion for that music.

Are there any nicer guys on this forum who can relate to all this crazines that I've had to deal with, and help me resolve some of these issues, instead of reaching people who treat me like dirt?

#212267 by GuitarMikeB
Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:02 pm
Have you tried the Personal Ads rather than the musician ads? :roll:

#212268 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:07 pm
GuitarMikeB wrote:Have you tried the Personal Ads rather than the musician ads? :roll:


Those places are worse, espeically ONLINE. A lot of people use those places to find sex, and more often than not, people on those sites or on that section of a site are even less open about who they are as a person. For example, go on Craigslist, and you'll find people requesting massages, or a workout buddy, or requests for very inappropriate stuff. I'm trying to reach some middle ground musicians. Those who are talented, but who are not currently playing in a band, but who have some general friends already to do other activities with, but who may not have a buddy to play some pop and soft rock covers with. If I used the personals, I'd be dealing with the same exact crap. Believe me, this is coming from experience. I tried the personals section of Craigslist, and reached people who just wanted to take advantage of me. I tried OKCupid, and came across some guys who liked the music I enjoy, but who weren't musicians, and those who were, were into playing classical music, or heavy rock, not someone with eclectic tastes.

Second of all, I may not want to pursue a music career yet, but I'd like to reach someone who might want to put something together later on, after working on some pop and soft rock covers, and some originals together.

Also regardless of whether I use the musician section or the personals section, the person who's interested ends up living in a section of Baton Rouge that takes 45 minutes or more for him to drive to my house, or I'll reach someone who lives in a city NEAR Baton Rouge, rather than reaching someone right here in Baton Rouge. Yes, I'm legally blind, and cannot drive, thus I need to reach individuals who live within my area of Baton Rouge.
Last edited by CliffordN25 on Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.

#212280 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:45 pm
Another downside to using personals is that quite a lot of those sites want you to fill out a profile which asks for what I look for based on personal appearance, like hieght, weight, eye color, hair color, etc... when that's not important to me. Also a lot of these personals sites you actually have to pay to use them, and well, I don't want to pay for a service that I don't know anything about yet. Also a lot of these personals sites out there have an ugly interface, or it's advertised to be good, but turns out to be a scam. For example, I tried Plentyoffish.com, but they didn't have a good help system, so I didn't understand what most of the features were.

#212283 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:58 pm
Another thing that makes personals sites a bad idea is that since I'm looking for a talented keyboard player who has a passion for playing a wide variety of pop and soft rock that spans the 70s, 80s, 90s, 2000s and the current decade, I need to be able to check out some videos and audio of him playing, and review his music background. In my case, I'm looking for someone who's a little bit more advanced than me, and can show me how to do multi-track recording, and play around on multiple keyboards, and even drum machines, and using some of the sound enhancement tools on recording software.

Also you've got to keep in mind that after becoming friends with this keyboard player, I'd like to CONTINUE making friends through him, both general friends, and some other musician friends.

#212292 by CliffordN25
Wed Apr 17, 2013 10:19 pm
So with that said, I still need to use musician connection sites, but I need to connect with those who are more casual, rather than those who play music to make a living.

Also the site which had a personal section that I DID give a try, (Craigslist) I can't use anymore due to the fact that I was banned from the site in early 2011, over something really trivial. Before I was banned, all I did was use the music discussion board to try to learn about some new sites to try, but everybody I came across had the same attitude as most of the regulars here and on BRR. They had very short fuses, and felt that I was invalidating their suggestion.

Backpage was another site I gave a try, but I rarely got anything good from that site either.

And I don't think there any public places where I can put up a personal's ad.

#212303 by PaperDog
Thu Apr 18, 2013 1:41 am
Glambert, Take your medicines... Or I will have to report you to your parents

#212305 by CliffordN25
Thu Apr 18, 2013 2:17 am
PaperDog wrote:Glambert, Take your medicines... Or I will have to report you to your parents


Come on, ignore these trolls, and let me start seeing some good advice, and let me start seeing some people around my age who are much more relaxed. Help me for once, make some progress in this search. Again, this means taking some time to have more in depth discussions about the very thing you are reccommending, and reaching more guys in general who like more of the music I enjoy.

To all of you who think I'm crazy, I'm not. I just want to pursue music the right way. First as a hobby, with a few friends, THEN depending on how things go, take it from there.

But all of you guys who come back with rude comments need to get a life. I run into too much of that, even when I'm not even posting. For example, go to an Adam Lambert music video, you'll see trolls of all kinds, and then people responding to those trolls trying to "defend" Adam, when that just fuels the fire.

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