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#211521 by ANGELSSHOTGUN
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:02 am
Mike, The song was interesting. Why didn't you record the instrumental parts with the same skills the vocal parts were recorded with. Work on it friend...

Sorry I can't blow sunshine up any ones butt. I'm my own worst critic.

#211522 by MikeTalbot
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:09 am
Yeah. I learned much from this. My experience is taking a well rehearsed band into the studio and letting the engineer work his magic. In this case we worked this song out as a group in the time it took to record it. (4hrs) Lots of cut and pasting and over dubbing – much different than in the days of tape.

I need to learn to produce my own songs. The fact that the singer is a pro and has a great voice made me hesitant to micro manage. And I do like some of it. Next time: I micromanage.

Any well-deserved criticism of this should justly fall on me since those boys were willing to do what I told them. Although I felt the drummer lacked enthusiasm he had his thing right. I liked the bass player. My own playing could have been mixed much better and probably played better too!

Talbot

#211523 by jimmydanger
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:10 am
Wow. I didn't expect that. Very interesting ideas, not fully realized but lots to work with. I liked your singing but unfortunately it really doesn't go with the rocking music. Your voice has a young Johnny Cash sound to it. I can picture it with acoustic instruments much better. For this song I would find some young buck to sing the lyrics. Work with the drummer a little more and rerecord it. Overall I say it's really cool!

#211524 by jimmydanger
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:12 am
Oops I didn't realize that wasn't you singing until I read your reply to Glenny. But that makes it easier to say the singer doesn't fit.

#211527 by gbheil
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:20 am
Story telling lyrical styles have got to be the most difficult to structure.

For some odd reason it puts me in remembrance of the animated Hobbit movie . . . the old one you know . . .

I like the music, I like the lyrical content, the combination of the two in a flowing context is going to be a mean trick.

#211528 by PaperDog
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:23 am
Mike...

What Can I say... Its a brilliant piece of work...Here's why I think that.

The body/soul/form of this piece is comprised of a warrior's tale, in graceful execution of Rock, screened in a post 60's Carbine rifle texture LOL!

Its surreal reality... And the funny part of it is that no matter how you embellish it, listeners will never fully grasp the underlying truth of your experiences...and yet, they will never be able to dispute or ignore them either. In a nut shell, the song is wholly plausible.

I got a feel of a little bit of "Wall of Voodoo" in that beast. (They were masters at keeping things alive, with gesture of the musical movements

Production: Needs to be done in a real studio with a real engineer, who has a thorough grasp of the dynamics this song demands. The Guitar tracks need separation, and a touch more clarity and polish. Some panning wouldn't hurt (for that traverse over the wall)

Anyhoot ...Excellent work, Mr! :D

#211532 by Jahva
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:38 am
Mike is it your song or you just playing for someone?

Lyrically the theme seems right for the music (I like)... but the singers tone is the odd man to me ears. But he doesn't sound bad he reminds me of J. Morrison singing "Touch me" with Tony Iommi playing guitar behind him. :P

There is clarity in the vocals and drums throughout but the Guitars get lost a bit in the mix. Need some enhancement whether through panning or some reverb, just a bit dry to me. Glad to hear you're getting to do some work.

#211542 by MikeTalbot
Wed Apr 10, 2013 2:20 am
Thanks guys for the feedback. My overall take - it was great to get back in the game. Next time will be better.

Jahva - yeah I wrote it. I'd be hesitant to post covers with all the stuff you rascals are creating!

Talbot

#211555 by J-HALEY
Wed Apr 10, 2013 12:15 pm
Mike, I think it is a brilliant song. I think the singers voice is great he is on pitch and has a very nice voice. He does have a Johnny Cash sound in this song, if you wanted to change that (I wouldn't) but you could do the song in a different key capo up a fret or 2. The guitar playing is off time in a couple of spots and I would like to hear a little more staccato in that intro segment you play several times. In other words a little sharper shorter strumming. As Jimmy said you have a lot to work with here! You could try changing how you are fretting the chords or use a different chord pattern or phrasing to aid in a more staccato sound in that intro as I mentioned previously. I Like it! 2 thumbs up brother! 8)

#211571 by GuitarMikeB
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:25 pm
I have to agree with those who said the vocal style doesn't really fit the music style. COuld you re-record the guitars in a more 'up front'/less distorted tone? As Jeff says, the guitars are a bit off tempo a couple of times.
Was this recorded 'live' (at t least the music), or separate instruments at a time? The vocal doesn't really 'sit' with the instruments as it is.

#211577 by jw123
Wed Apr 10, 2013 1:38 pm
For the vocals the guitar is way to distorted to my mind, I hear a Fender Twin with a hint of distortion going well with the vocals, kinda Johnny Cash meets Iron Butterfly in my mind.

I feel some slide guitar would go good with this.

Not bad but I would tighten up the guitar riffs if I were you.

But in the end its your interpretation, which is all that matters, if you like then screw all of us, RIGHT?

#211582 by MikeTalbot
Wed Apr 10, 2013 2:28 pm
Good replies - thanks boys.

I too have problems with the guitar - I allowed the engineer to 'fix' a few things better deleted and re-recorded. Additionally, there are tempo bits in there that the drummer didn't hear but I foolishly played them anyway.

next time I'll record it myself first and call out all the bits very carefully to the players and be more of a producer. Now that I know what I'm looking for anyhow.

The guitar sounds more distorted than I realized at the time - the tape hears more than the ear I reckon and of course I was playing through headphones.

Slide? Not a bad idea.

thanks everyone

Talbot

#211583 by Planetguy
Wed Apr 10, 2013 2:30 pm
cool tune.

and very ambitious w the time change ups. i think they really keep things moving forward. yeah, some of 'em could be a little tighter but overall i think they work. perhaps the drummer could do a better job w those segues?

#211585 by jimmydanger
Wed Apr 10, 2013 2:42 pm
Mike, regarding using headphones, I always track in the control room, that way I can hear the music through the studio monitors, not some crappy phone speakers. I can still see the drummer through the window, and if we really know the parts there's not much of a need to see each other (usually, there's always exceptions). But as a rule I try to record rhythm parts cleaner than I might play them live. You can always dirty them up afterwards.

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