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#115918 by philbymon
Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:08 pm
Tronix:

"Abandon Your Gods" - the old Sabbath-style intro with the scream at the very start told me where this was headed. Timing issues seem to predominate, for me, next to the garage band screamo voice. Very loosely disjointed. Your singer needs work on phrasing & breathing. (Obviously, this screamo stuff just ain't my thing...)

"Welcome to Hell" - Very throwback guitar style, I think, on both pieces. This could (& should!) have had some actual singing on it, perhaps even in conjunction with the screamo. There are possibilities for melody that are being ignored, to the detriment of the piece. The odd low & high screams are strange to my ears. It seems that there should be a REASON for the switch, to me, but that isn't the case.

As far as the musicianship - it's okay, for the needs of the songs, but I was hoping for a blistering lead, a double guitar part, a strong melodic break, or something to give me some relief from the screams.

I really think the voice is being overused in these two songs, & that some musical interludes are definitely called for in both of them.

I also realize that I have strong compulsions to trash this style, & I'm trying my best to control myself in all my critiques in this area. It just often seems to me that the band is trying to stay as far from actual melody as possible, when I hear this stuff, & that, to me, just seems counter-productive, in any musical setting.

#115925 by Tronix
Sat Jun 26, 2010 2:30 pm
philbymon wrote:Tronix:

"Abandon Your Gods" - the old Sabbath-style intro with the scream at the very start told me where this was headed. Timing issues seem to predominate, for me, next to the garage band screamo voice. Very loosely disjointed. Your singer needs work on phrasing & breathing. (Obviously, this screamo stuff just ain't my thing...)

"Welcome to Hell" - Very throwback guitar style, I think, on both pieces. This could (& should!) have had some actual singing on it, perhaps even in conjunction with the screamo. There are possibilities for melody that are being ignored, to the detriment of the piece. The odd low & high screams are strange to my ears. It seems that there should be a REASON for the switch, to me, but that isn't the case.

As far as the musicianship - it's okay, for the needs of the songs, but I was hoping for a blistering lead, a double guitar part, a strong melodic break, or something to give me some relief from the screams.

I really think the voice is being overused in these two songs, & that some musical interludes are definitely called for in both of them.

I also realize that I have strong compulsions to trash this style, & I'm trying my best to control myself in all my critiques in this area. It just often seems to me that the band is trying to stay as far from actual melody as possible, when I hear this stuff, & that, to me, just seems counter-productive, in any musical setting.


Thanks Phil, you are right in everything you are saying, the best answer I can come up with is, we are rookies, lol..I'd love to put more melody in our songs, but how to do it is whats keeping me from. The next song we are due to start working on, I sing the verses, and I don't scream, I have no talent for it, and I can hold pitch and key better, I'm not great by any stretch, but I'm a far cry from Joe (my lead Vox), who has the heart, desire and work ethic, but not the talent..lol Its getting much better as we go along and as musicians have been upgraded..
we really aren't trying to avoid melody , the opposite in fact, we're learning how to write songs as we go, so with every song we are adding more and more melody, change ups, and solo work..I'd say my band is on step 5, and these cuts are from when we were more like a 2..
thanks a million tho Phil, for the solid critique :D

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