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So I get 5 emails from some guy who is hot to have me back up his new project. (I had this foreboding fear..)

Turns out I was right.

This cat writes me exactly one line each time he write me, no more and no less.

He loves the samples, but he has NO SAMPLES of any kind at all.

Then he's adamant about wanting to know where I live.
(I told him to just forget that.)

Then he's on about how old I am.

I keep mentioning to him that I need some kind of sample to figure out if I even want to hear him play.

Finally he gets all mad because I mentioned that if he actually had 5 original tunes and no sample, he's a little ass backwards.

Then he starts doing this "Cliffy" thing where he just keeps ranting about his music is this and that. (I told him to just cut a little snippet of something and either post it and let me hear it or send it to me via email.)

The finale is that he gets quite upset, tells me that he wants to meet me to fight and how much better his music is than what I have posted.

He then goes ALL CAPS ON ME FOR THE REST OF THE COUPLE OF EMAILS.

He gives me the "YOU JUST WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND" crap at the end.

I'm just wrung out. If you got 5 original tunes, is not that big a deal to cut up a piece of it and send it as a sample, is it?

I mean my tech skills are lacking, but even I can do this.
What was the big deal? I mean the only reason he wanted to get together was he heard something in the samples I have posted.

Jesus save us all from the real whack jobs masquerading as musicians.

Does your cat play drums too?

Well obviously he thinks you are just TOO CUTE, Scott!

Damn I thought it was going to be Cliffey! Maybe he's got some relatives up in the tri-state area.
I had an email from a guy about a month ago... invites me over to his home studio and when I asked for a snippet of what he does all went silent. There doesn't seem to be a shortage of weirdfaqs out there.
I don't even get the point of that kind of chit... what's to gain? Is he going to try and steal your music?
Maybe he's an adult version of Cliffey and he just wants to have lunch and play some video games!

LMAO OMG I don't who's remarks were worse, Mike's or Jahva's..

I really think he was just trying to get me to play bass with his "band" but how can you not even have so much as a sample if you "have 5 original tunes" and yet searching for people to intake ???

That's like having a meatball sub with no torpedo roll/bread of any kind.

I really like people that say the same thing, attempting to win you over with facts/figures, thinking that if you weren't convinced about how wonderful they are all they need do is to shake and say it again 500 times as if we'd change our minds.

I don't care if it was the Deftones, if you have no sample...you best get one.

Furthermore if I don't bite on whatever your bullshit is, the next 1000 times you say it. It won't mean anything else to me with repetition. (you can say it 1 million times, same effect.)

And if you actually have 5 tunes you like, attempt to have a little slice of something you can post or email as a sample. To not do this is indicative of a dingdong or someone who is lacking foresight.

The music I was using is not just mine, it's Lester's and mine. And I'm sure the vultures are waiting to see if I can make any money on it and then the fun begins, so I already decided not to use it/sell it/whatever.
Besides, I'm not going in that direction at this point.

Of the bands I have been sorting through, I have some 5 other samples of other people's work. I listen to them, evaluate them to see if I think I could fit in and then I go audition/jam and then if it goes south, I just delete their sample.

Otherwise I invite them to the forum and tell them that they can probably find someone else here that will fill the bill for them if we don't mesh.

(and my samples are on the home page)

You know, I'd take the devil into a band setup as long as he could play and had a sample of what he sounded like.

Am I asking too much of these people to hear something that they did at any time in their life?

I feel like I am asking for a pint of their blood or is a kidney>?

I think serious musicians , who use online methods to incur a physical collaboration are an exception and not the norm. (maybe 1 % of the whole pool). Anything else is folks, expressing their 'wish' of wanting to be a musician...

What are you on about, Grant?

I answer ads from Craigslist and filter through them, looking for something reasonable amidst the dung.

I play at open mics, but those people tend to have something they are already doing. Even so, I want a sample of what they are playing before I agree to go back and jam at their crib.

You got a better idea or you just sticking your "club thumb" in my eyeball>?

It's the age of the computer, learn to use it to it's full potential.

I don't care if you meet musicians during an armed robbery, IF THEY CAN PLAY something you like and YOU CAN PLAY something they like, that's pretty much the ballgame.

I guess what i am saying is that there is no tried and true way, you just have to make your way through the chaos and do the best you can.

We all know damn well that very few of these people at Bmix are the type that reply/behave in a predictable manner/are forthright in their search.

I.E> You have to do whatever it takes.

I could sit on my ass and wait for grass to grow, but what's the point of that nonsense? God helps those who help themselves..better get up off your fat and move about, see what's going on around you unless you think the world is coming to you.. That's just a fallacy of composition.

BE PROACTIVE or be silent, that's really your only choice.

What are you on about, Grant?

I answer ads from Craigslist and filter through them, looking for something reasonable amidst the dung.

I play at open mics, but those people tend to have something they are already doing. Even so, I want a sample of what they are playing before I agree to go back and jam at their crib.

You got a better idea or you just sticking your "club thumb" in my eyeball>?

It's the age of the computer, learn to use it to it's full potential.

I don't care if you meet musicians during an armed robbery, IF THEY CAN PLAY something you like and YOU CAN PLAY something they like, that's pretty much the ballgame.

I guess what i am saying is that there is no tried and true way, you just have to make your way through the chaos and do the best you can.

We all know damn well that very few of these people at Bmix are the type that reply/behave in a predictable manner/are forthright in their search.

I.E> You have to do whatever it takes.

I could sit on my ass and wait for grass to grow, but what's the point of that nonsense? God helps those who help themselves..better get up off your fat and move about, see what's going on around you unless you think the world is coming to you.. That's just a fallacy of composition.

BE PROACTIVE or be silent, that's really your only choice.

Yeah, My better idea is this... Picking through the Craig s list dung, like a dumpster -diver, hoping to find something of real value may ain't my idea of pro-active. (If it worked, we'd all have Hot-Chicks for bassists and we'd all be that guy with the best connections to A & R labels.) Here's a novel concept... Stop scoffing at the Open Mics people (You know , the ones you don't talk to cause they are even nerdier than the guys you say are too busy for you) and get their samples.. They probably look up to you and are waiting for the leadership...
Hey I could be wrong about it all... But I know that Online works better AFTER you've already met the hot chick.

I don't know why people knock Craigslist, it works as well or better than any other method out there. We met our drummer on CL; he ran an ad and we just happened to be looking for a drummer. Sure there are wackos and wannabes, same as BM or anything else. The skill is in being able to conduct a proper phone interview and screen out the crap. I can usually tell in a couple of questions whether the candidate is a waste of time.

I don't know why people knock Craigslist, it works as well or better than any other method out there. We met our drummer on CL; he ran an ad and we just happened to be looking for a drummer. Sure there are wackos and wannabes, same as BM or anything else. The skill is in being able to conduct a proper phone interview and screen out the crap. I can usually tell in a couple of questions whether the candidate is a waste of time.

Well, I suppose if one needs a quick session or project musician, Then Craigs list isn't so bad... But its not a good idea to get too picky, or expect too much alignment or cohesiveness in a band that is assembled solely on 'cold calls' for audition.
(And Scotty, I don't disagree with you regarding the samples required. It wouldn't make sense to have a person audition , who cant provide some evidence of a body of work.)

I am sorry to say that my little brain in dealing with other musicians for the past 25 years has been....strike one...your out!

I don't know why people knock Craigslist, it works as well or better than any other method out there. We met our drummer on CL; he ran an ad and we just happened to be looking for a drummer. Sure there are wackos and wannabes, same as BM or anything else. The skill is in being able to conduct a proper phone interview and screen out the crap. I can usually tell in a couple of questions whether the candidate is a waste of time.

Dang Jimmy we agree on something!

At this point, I say a silent prayer every time I meet someone who might be able to play a little bit but most of the decent ones are already under conscript.

And I talk to everyone. You ought to be able to guess that. Maybe I talk too much? Ya think? lol Yeah..not much surprise to me and what goes on.

I have to laugh, I don't know what you been thinking but I can do more with a room full of nerds than I can do with a room full of pro musicians. The pros have egos and the nerds will break their backs trying to please you.

No, I'd rather have the full GEEK setup. I KNOW that bunch will play very well with much technical expertise, be reliable and be honest about what they like and what they don't like.

The pros are often only interested in something that motivates them on whatever plane of existence they are currently living on.

Gimme a GEEK every time. He may not look good but he'll sound like gold and if you treat them well, you have an ally for life.

Rich you sound like a tough guy to work with. Remind me never to cross you. Nothing irritates me more than finding something worthwhile and having to stop because somehow the proverbial monkey wrench ended up in the clock tower gears again.
If I was "strike one and you're out", I'd have written considerably less materials by now considering people by nature are controlling and flighty as a general rule.

Samples are ok. I don't base anything solely off of a sample. Some people are better than their sample and some are worse then their sample. I like people to have SOMETHING but it doesn't have to be a lot or elaborate, just SOMETHING. If I like the sample in any way, that suggests a jam or informal audition.

Jimmy, you can tell just by talking to them? Wow, I envy you.
I don't know anything until I play with them just a little bit. The sample is enough for basic interest, but I need to feel their musical prowess in order to be confident that someone will be able to do what they say they will do. Plenty of "talkers" out there and later on they start with the shrugs and blank looks.

And for the record, I won't take the hot chicks. I want people who play music, not the stripper pole. It's not impossible that I would utilize a female musician but I'd prefer she was as ugly as they come because then I know that woman would be playing as if her life depended on it and that's the type of player I really like. "Play like your life depends on it".

I remember this one smoking hot woman that wanted to play bass. She was great to look at but she was a total loss as a bassist. You have to ask yourself, "what exactly is this person going to do for the band as a whole"? If you can't answer that precisely, man or woman, human or alien, you don't need that in your band setup.

I think that we all share a commonality in that we go through the same things as time goes on. IMO we are all more alike than different, we just have different tastes in what kind of music we prefer on the basic level.

So Jeff, to hear that you have something in common with Jimmy, doesn't surprise me at all. I figure that you have more in common than just that, just like we all do.

PS: The little brains are on the outside looking in. This is the big-boy sandbox here at BandMix, most all of the little brains couldn't figure out how to get in and that's why they stay out in the cold. The rest are busy warming by the fires of creativity.

It gets very cold in the deepest darkest part of the night, bring a lantern to light your way, would ya?

PS: Deadguitars, saw your CL ad too !!! Good Luck to you as well..

Scott

A phone 'interview' can save you lots of time. I doubt you can tell who will be the exact fit - but you can certainly tell who won't be!

As to chicks - surely you don't want ugly people in your band! My own standard has slipped but only due to age - I want to be the worst musician and ugliest person in the band.

Talbot

"Ugly" can play. "Ugly women" play almost in a supernaturally good way.
They have to or else risk getting the proverbial sharp stick in the eye.
Same with "ugly" guys. They play like they are 2 seconds from being fired. (because they are)

As for the phone? If I had a dollar for every "talker" that could talk the slip off of a cow, I'd need many buckets for all the milk.

The proof is in the pudding...as in when you play, I can tell.

Talking, my friend, is not playing and vice versa.

I can deal with people that don't talk at all but play like hell.
The question is "can you deal with people that talk, but cannot play"?

I don't want to deal with those people..play first, learn to talk later on in life. lol

I knew this one guy that smelled so bad he almost made me want to puke, but the man could play like something was chasing him.

Brrrr. I hate to say it, but I'd rather have to smell his worst than have a great smelling person that was a "wash" as a musician.

Some of this stuff you just can't teach or coach.

And lemme tell ya, no one EVER told him he smelled.
He was just THAT good.

Scotty - I guess you never had to take a 4 hour van ride with Mr Smelly!

Other than Craigslist, there aren't many options that give you at least certain VOLUME of people to check. The bulletin boards at music stores are mostly empty these days. Other places (BM is just one of them) for musician listings are not well known and mostly filled with wannabes or people already commited to projects/bands.
I have learned to only make a first quick judgement based on a person's online (or other) music examples. Better call can be made by a live video rather than a well-polished music sample done in a studio. Some of the singers we audtioned for Instant Karma sounded good on their samples but sucked royally when put into a live audition.
Hey, I know I'm not 'the next greatest thing', that's why I put links to my videos and tunes in my ads - people can check me out first - I expect to be able to do the same with others.