Don't give up for sure. Those people are out there. They just haven't found you yet. One thing I have learned is not to just settle for someone, OR (worse) bring someone in as a "project." If there are yellow flags early, it will get worse. I guarantee it. I have also stopped seeing a band as a democracy. We (my wife--a bass player--and I) are emphatic that this is our band, it is marketed as such, we are the faces, singers and front people and you may be a part of the band, but you are here because it is working for us personally and professionally. Drama, inability to shift with the needs of the music as requested, showing up late for practice or gigs, showing up drunk, getting drunk, getting combative, bad overall attitude--especially on stage, etc? You are done.
I am also fine with reaching out a fair distance from where I live to find the right people. After some big, but necessary changes early this year we have a rotating crew of dependable professionals with several great options to come in permanently. This year I've used 8 different drummers, 2 keys players and 3 second guitarists for recording and some of our mini tours. It is a bit stressful but it works. The people we have are pros and learn the material, show up when asked and do their jobs. I like that. Just this past week, one of the keys players (one of the best I know of) agreed to join permanently. We have 3 drummers who have answered ads to try out and a guy who has been filling in for a lot of local shows who we want to give first right of refusal for the job. It isn't easy to find the right people, but they are there. As I said, they just haven't found you yet