This is a MUSIC forum. Irrelevant or disrespectful posts/topics will be removed by Admin. Please report any forum spam or inappropriate posts HERE.

Relive your fondest & worst memories "on the road".

Moderators: bandmixmod1, jimmy990, spikedace

#258062 by RGMixProject
Tue Apr 05, 2016 4:17 pm
DON.T!

1. Let your ears get damaged
2. Argue with the sound man in front of your audience
3. Take too long to tune your guitar on stage
4. Point out your perfrmance flaws
5. Talk too much when performing
6. Bring other musicians down
7. Let your ego get in the way
8. Shout into a microphone at close range
9. Argue with the venue staff
10. Entertain the crowd not yourself
11. Be late for the gid or sound check
12. Never leave the venue immediately after your set
13. Don't get drunk or wasted.
14. Don.t piss off the sound man
15. Don't stop a song when you break a string
16. Don't keep playing if a fight breaks out in the audience

The things I had to deal with on guitar and vocal egos;


1. Play really fast solos- The more notes the better. Please do not concern yourself with good phrasing or timing or expression; only play the notes as fast as you can. The best place to practice these techniques is at the local music store. Ask to try out a guitar and amp, turn it up really loud and then proceed to play really really fast. I bet everyone in the store will stop and say; "Wow, he is really good, I wish I was him." The store employees will also want to become your friends. They won't be annoyed with you at all. The true musician only plays fast.
2. Turn up your amp- If you are in a band, you are in control. There is no reason you should be able to hear the bass, drums or any other instrument. You should be much more loud then everyone else. If during practice you can make out what the other musicians are playing and your amp is already at 10... buy a new, more powerful amp. It is also suggested that you turn down other amps when they are not looking. The other people in the band just don't know as much as you.
3. Learn the intros to popular songs such as crazy train. Stop playing when you reach the hard part with chords
4. Don't worry about playing in time; that's the drummer's department. Go crazy.
5. You have to make faces. Notice how all the good guitarists make weird faces, like either they are talking to themselves or making funny faces at an imaginary baby? You gotta do that. Stretching of the facial muscles will help your fingers move faster.
6. Hate everyone that plays better or faster than you with passion. Try everything to find mistakes in their playing so you can point them out.
7. Remember that there is no part in the song that would not be improved by your little improvisations. Stick in little riffs everywhere. If there is another instrument taking a solo, be sure to jump right in (on) and add all the amazing value that you know you can.
8. If you happen to come across another person playing on a guitar, interrupt him/her immediately. Make him/her hand over the instrument and sit down so (s)he can listen to you. Make sure not to stop playing until the moment has past and everybody moves on to something else.
9. Make sure not to actually play a song. Just noodle around on it aimlessly, everyone will be impressed!
10. Pay no attention to bass players. After all, they are basically just 2/3 of a guitar player that nobody listens to anyway.
11. If when your shredding a solo and you mess up, turn around and frown at the bass player. Everyone will know it is his fault then.
12. Swinging your guitar over your shoulder shows how much of a badass you are. Don't bother learning songs, practice this all day. What could go wrong?
13. Show up wasted to everything. Rehearsals, gigs, family funerals... if you are not wasted you are not a guitar player.
14. Never bring extra guitar strings to practice. If you break one, practice is over. Same goes for shows. This is what the pros do.
15. Never, and i mean ever, set up equipment. You have a bassist and a drummer for a reason. They should be carrying in and setting up all the gear while you sit at the bar and score some poon. This is the way of the pro guitarist.
16. Always show up late and leave early- You need to make people realize that your time is more important then theirs. They should feel honored just to have you in the room with them. This rule applies to any event that you are suppose to be attending; including but not limited to- Practices, gigs, birthday parties, work, Dr. appointments, funerals, weddings, and yard sales.
17. Always remember, the soundguy/girl has no idea what he/she is doing. It is imperative that you "twist yer own knobs", and berate them over the microphone. They love this.
#258075 by schmedidiah
Tue Apr 05, 2016 10:05 pm
:lol: wish this forum had a clapping smiley.


Now be honest. Cut and paste? Original?
#258089 by GuitarMikeB
Wed Apr 06, 2016 12:31 pm
The "Don't" section could apply to any/all players in a band.

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests