General Music Chat

Kramer, do you feel better now?

Im glad you got that off your chest.

I guess if you ever find out your living in a lie either your own or someone elses its time to run to the hills.

Damn I might have to lay down a blues song tonite, I was planning on a KC and The Sunshine Band type dance number but after reading this Ive got a terrible headache.

Kramer, do you feel better now?

Im glad you got that off your chest.

I guess if you ever find out your living in a lie either your own or someone elses its time to run to the hills.

Damn I might have to lay down a blues song tonite, I was planning on a KC and The Sunshine Band type dance number but after reading this Ive got a terrible headache.

haha yes, I feel great.

Do I sound bitter? NAAAH!

Trust me, Mike, you don't understand. I'm not a quitter, I'm not "damaged goods." However, and I really mean this, I would love to know how I could have fixed that situation (by your own rationale, it's going to happen to me again, right?)

joseph - well stated. no I don't understand... can we move past that point now?

only you can decide if it was the right thing to do so why are you waiting for me to tell you I agree?

when asked -90% of marriages end over issues related to money.
no matter how much you have you will always find a way to spend it. one person almost always controls it... perhaps next time it will be you and you will see the problem from her perspective.

I really don't want to argue with you... you made a good case. I know this is going to be very unpopular with you, but perhaps you should have gotten a separate account and showed her your side of the table? Perhaps you shouldn't have let it get so far in the first place?
Perhaps I would have done the sm thing you did... I'm in no way implying that I would have done a better job than you... but if I were in your shoes I would hope that you would have the nerve to tell me what you saw from a completely unbiased position.
the fact remains she was the one you married at one point. she was sweet at one point. she did not turn into a daemon(based on what I've heard so far... and that is only your side of the story). that sweet person was still there.
again, not saying I could have fixed that mess... not saying you are a failure for quiting, or even a bad person... in fact you seem quite nice.
few people can disagree and still respect each other.
did she want to work it out? if yes, then all you had to do is set up some rules that would not enable her to take advantage of you. if she didn't want to work it out then SHE QUIT.

it doesn't sound like you had much of a team going in the first place... and that's too bad. I bet she's realized some of the mistakes she made... it's too bad she had to loose everything to get there(speculation).

... kramerguy makes some good points. perhaps my "reasons to quit" should be amended... I'll admit that...

but I'm not naive. I've been kicked hard too.

if the girl cheated then she quit first.
if she's not willing to try then she quit first.
there's no such thing as not relinquishing control if the other party takes it away. if you let the next girl walk all over you she will likely keep walking till you get fed up and quit. I'm sorry. I hate to say that. I know you won't like me because of it... but that has no impact whatsoever on it's accuracy.
shred6 - don't ask for advice and expect consolation. it's not advice you seek... it's your echo. I won't ask for advice and then get angry when someone doesn't automatically agree with me.
I'm not holier than thou... I'll be the first to admit I often fall short of my own ideals... but that has never stopped them from being true.

Yeah, Mike, you are right. I was trying to get you to agree with me, or at least see things my way. You have a very rational approach and it works for ya. That's cool.
You used a few terms that I felt were a little harsh, and that's why I reacted...but it's done. I don't want to beat that dead horse anymore.

Shredd, I'm sorry about the hijack as well and wish you the best of luck.

roger that... the horse is dead... I'll crawl back under my bridge.

For Christ's sake Mike! What the hell is your problem other than you seem to like to argue with people over a computer other than face to face like a MAN does. The whole "she's continually cheating" was NEVER written for example. She constantly accuses ME of doing that. I only started this not to "hear what I want to hear", but rather to try to understand what the next steps should be to remedy the bad situation. I can't say whether I like you or not because I don't even know you dude. I didn't get angry with your response other than the fact that you obviously didn't get the whole point of the thread to start with. I'm sure that you only mean well like everyone else does and believe me when I say that I'll NEVER judge you as a person...that's up to GOD to decide. Also it's not my echo that I seek, it's just honest opinions from others that have been in a similar situation as the one that I'm in right now. I really don't need YOUR drama anymore so please move on. I'm moving on because I know what I have to do because everyone that participated in this thread gave me some damn good advice so THANKS GUYS!!! Other than that I'd suggest that you learn how to speak to people without judgement against them if they don't follow your path because there's several paths in this life that will ALL eventually lead to the same place where people can hopefully discuss their life experiences without judgement. KARMA MIKE, KARMA. Believe in it before it's too late for you bro.

With that being said I guess I'll let you all know that whether it's right or wrong I've been trying my hardest to talk to her to lay off me to a point and it seems to be getting through. I think the best thing for my family is to stay together as a family and for my wife to make some MAJOR adjustments to how she thinks and acts. I'm not cheating and have no desire to do so. All I want to do is to rock out like the rest of us do and if that's a crime, then break out the cuffs and throw me in jail right now. I was actually in the middle of writing a new metal tune (surprise, suprise) when I came in to take a break and talk to my wife some more (BECAUSE I'M NO QUITTER MIKEY!) when I couldn't believe all of the posts that happened while I was in my studio. Anyhow, I'll leave it at that.

P.S.- Mike...You're not such a bad dude man. I just wanted to let you know that bro. I wouldn't have sent you a Myspace friend request if I thought that you were a jerk man. I actually really liked your material. Keep it up brother and best of luck in the future to all of you AWESOME DUDES!!!!!!!!!

"KEEP IT REAL...KEEP IT HONEST...KEEP IT METAL...but most importantly...KEEP SHREDDIN'!!!!!!!!!

shred... I was ready to go away but...

i've never seen anyone argue with themselves alone
(aren't you arguing too?)

if you think I'd be afraid to say this to your face you are wrong... man or not. If you are suggesting you'd like to substitute violence for our pleasant conversation then I really must pity you.


"she's continually cheating" refers to the idea that ppul often project their own guilt on to others... a concept introduced by someone other than myself... but introduced all the same. ie try to grasp the idea that she's accusing you of cheating because she's cheating herself... it is at least a possibility - at which point I feel you would be justified in leaving her... it's an ugly thought... and I'm sorry I brought it up given your fragile state (or I'm sorry someone else brought it up).


"Also it's not my echo that I seek, it's just honest opinions from others" except, of course, when others offer an opinion you don't share - at which point you'll do your best to stifle them (telling them to move on) and tell them that THEY are arguing.
Let me school you a bit: WE are arguing... but I don't have an ounce of anger over it... even when you tell me I'm not a man... that's ok... I understand you are upset and I forgive you.

this is a rational argument on my side of the fence... but alas I see I've upset you... sorry about that.
perhaps this will make you feel better:

I've had a change of heart... you should divorce her... she sounds bad... you are right... she is wrong... she has hurt you and deserves nothing... after all she thinks she's right... she interrupts your jamming... she accuses you of cheating... obviously the mark of a bad woman. these are all reasons you should move on to another relationship where you will never have any problems and life will undoubtedly be better for you and your son.


I love it when ppul say to move on, and then go on to get in their last shots. oh well, one person always has to have the last word I guess...
you go ahead and take it shred... I hope it makes you feel better.

cheers.
mv

Are you guys married?.


. . . to each other, I mean.