Musician Forum - Band Discussion Board - BandMix

If you want to get together to make music with me, there is one thing I ask of you:

Do what you say you will. Hey, I will, - you should, too.

I will do what I say.

If you can't meet on schedule, or if music is not so important to you - then just say 'no.'

If you have a lot of things you want to do, and music is just one of them: just say 'no;' save me some time.

I'd rather that someone says they can't play well enough, - instead of saying they can; then schedule a time to meet - and then get cold feet . . . happens all the time.

Or, if you have something else that you might have to do that day; ok. Fine. Tell me, and go do it. I'm not going to try to talk you into anything. Just go; it's ok..

But, if you lead me to believe something, and then don't do it, then you are unreliable.

I have a folder full of people who say how they like my songs and all, and how they want to get together to make music with me. But, I found that most people just want to talk about making music.
Once I try to set up a time to play - all the excuses start flowing . . .

I'm telling everone, right up front: the talkers and excuse-makers won't be working with me. They rob me of my time . . .

You may think you have a good excuse/reason, - and maybe you do. But I've heard every excuse four times already.

And, when I realize someone is giving me an excuse, I won't even let them know that I think they're B-S'ing me.
They think they've convinced me of their B.S., because I just say, "OK."

I'm not going to chase them down. I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt and give them a second chance; because they might have an honest reason for missing a meeting.

But - just be aware: the music world is FULL of musicians who are unreliable.

If I don't know someone, and they find reasons to miss the first one or two meetings - guess what category they fall in?



So, I won't waste time on these kinds of people; the 'tire-kickers." I'm busy.
Either they want to do it, or they don't.
If they 'kind-of' want to do music with me; sorry, I'm not interested.

If they're not sure what they want, then, until they figure it out, - maybe it'd be best for them to practice by themselves . . .

. . . or maybe just be a music fan and listen to CDs, or just listen to others play . . . whatever.

Maybe some of these folks just ARE fans, trying to be friends with me by acting like a fellow musician; I don't know . . .

Fans are fine. Music is meant to be heard, eh? And I don't mind friends, either . . .

It's just that, if you're not a real musician: please don't try to convince me that you ARE, ok?

Because I just might ask you to come over and play; and then you'll have to think of an excuse to not make it.



I AM a musician. And I AM reliable. If I suspect you are not, - don't be surprised if I don't contact you again.

Because, instead of chasing you: I'll be playing music.

Dang, it is too bad you don't live here in Orange CA. I only work with musicians who have the same ideals as I.

Alan,

You need to get laid more.

Excuse making and non-dependability are skills as important to a guitarist as the A Blues scale.

hahaha.. this should be polished and stickied to the top of the page.

My sentiments exactly, Alan

I hope that makes you feel better.

The truth is it isnt just musicians that dont follow up. It runs all thru our society these days.

Im with Craig on this. Take his advice.

Why the hell did you post this?

Gee, that sure is a wide range of responses . . .

RhythmMan_BluesRockFolk wrote:Gee, that sure is a wide range of responses . . .

Wide range of personalities here I guess.

Well, I think that's what should happen. So, I agree. And I think that it should be stickied, so newbies can see it.
Peace.

Yeah, I hear ya. But man, don't forget, it's all a learning curve. I've been that person that was gung-ho and then got cold-feet, and yk, I am grateful that I at least had the sense to come in out of the rain so-to-speak. And now that I am growing in my music, I have been on the receiving end of it as well. And I bet, if you think real hard, you'll remember a day when that was you too brother I'm sure you've tired of it by now, so be patient...and maybe take the guys suggestion lol I'm just jokin' with ya! Music is a harder business than what people can imagine, and it's not just business but it's your personal self. Insecurities get in the way sometimes...especially when it's a talented musician like your self...

I'm with you Rhythm-Man..

I'm spent much time on here complaining about these same problems.

My band has seen nearly every type come through our door, and a larger percentage who never even show up to the door.

Of the ones that piss me off the most are the ones who claim to know most or all of the songs in our songlist, and then show up and not really know ANY songs, just a few riffs, and later say "oh yeah, I meant that I knew the songs from hearing them, but I never actually learned them..."

WTF?? OMG ... DON'T tell us you know a song for an audition just because you know OF the song... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

Thats exactly what happened with the last two people we auditioned for bass.

And what happened? Both just "followed" my guitar lines. Great if our entire set is nothing but Rage against the Machine....

GRR!