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#288219 by t-Roy and The Smoking Section
Sun Jun 24, 2018 4:38 pm
davemus wrote:EDITED for clarity: I was working with a musical group renting a space from a non-musician visual artist member, and everything was going fine until the non-musician member (I'll call him Bob) came out one night and said in order to be a member of the group I had to follow the his strict set of ground rules...

It was late so I didn't call the founding member (I'll call him Fred), but the demand seemed out of line and some of the rules were contradictory, such as saying I had to be "loyal" and "promote" while stating I shouldn't have told anyone about Bob without his permission, otherwise I was just doing that to benefit only myself (how that makes sense I don't know). Since his words and the way he was saying them felt like I was encroaching and under criticism, I got upset, especially after being accused of using everyone for only my own benefit (I simply wanted to participate in the music and venue and utilize offered equipment though I had not learned some things the founding member had wanted me to due to job complications, which the jobless non-musician just scoffed at). When I'd asked what I could do to help previously, I was usually told "nothing", and when I'd asked about details of the visual art, apparently this offended Bob, and I should have asked different more "deeper meaning" questions.

Have you run into a situation like this? The whole thing has fractured the group for me and made me wary of helping out with the community otherwise. He insisted I was only helping for my own benefit, against all evidence and explanation, even though he said he "didn't know me"... I don't work with them anymore, but I don't know how you can insist on intent after saying you don't know someone.




that's totally effed up.

If it were me, I'd point out that I'm a musician.....and visual arts are for sissies and queers.

Not actually true....but that ought to make him leave you alone, at least.


Seriously.....tell this dufas it's about making great music that he can take his ego trip with. Ignore.






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