Musician Forum - Band Discussion Board - BandMix

[Jan 2014 - GuitarMikeB has written a song to this lyric - see his comments and profile]
[Mike has also posted a separate thread ("The Chains") with this song over on the "United States" forum]


The Chains

V
Tell them old stories
And how it was wrong
Make sure they remember
It’s never been gone


V
Tell them the mountain
Is so hard to climb
It’s ok to dream, but
It may not be time


Ch
Preserve the fears from long ago
It’s not the same, but don’t let them know
You need to justify the blame
Always remind them……of the chains


V
Live in resentment
No reason to try
The past is their anchor
You keep it alive


Br
They crawl because you tell them they can’t walk
Then you comfort them and say it’s not their fault


Ch
Preserve the fears from long ago
It’s not the same, but don’t let them know
You need to justify the blame
Always remind them…..of the chains
Remind them of the chains

Good form, can I steal them?

GuitarMikeB wrote:Good form, can I steal them?

Help yourself! I have been writing for a while and continue, so I have a bunch. I just recently started trying to put some of them to music, but I am a complete beginner on the song side. I did finally put one song on my profile. I hope to get better with time.

I've heard that Fenton is the KKK capital of Michigan. Any truth to that?

Firebird78 wrote:

GuitarMikeB wrote:Good form, can I steal them?

Help yourself! I have been writing for a while and continue, so I have a bunch. I just recently started trying to put some of them to music, but I am a complete beginner on the song side. I did finally put one song on my profile. I hope to get better with time.

Great, don't sue me when I get rich from it! Now I need to find a good sound clip of chains!

jimmydanger wrote:I've heard that Fenton is the KKK capital of Michigan. Any truth to that?

No! It's the MUSIC capital!!! LOL

GuitarMikeB wrote:

Firebird78 wrote:

GuitarMikeB wrote:Good form, can I steal them?

Help yourself! I have been writing for a while and continue, so I have a bunch. I just recently started trying to put some of them to music, but I am a complete beginner on the song side. I did finally put one song on my profile. I hope to get better with time.

Great, don't sue me when I get rich from it! Now I need to find a good sound clip of chains!

The guilt would get to you and you would share!!!

Here is one of the guys you mock - seconds before his buddy was shot - right in front of him - while they were fighting for equal rights in the south ....
Whats the biggest social injustice you have ever had ? Not being able to get the senior discount at the diner ?

Deadguitars wrote:
Here is one of the guys you mock - seconds before his buddy was shot - right in front of him - while they were fighting for equal rights in the south ....
Whats the biggest social injustice you have ever had ? Not being able to get the senior discount at the diner ?

No intent to mock anyone in this lyric, and apologies to anyone who might be offended. The point is there are those who benefit by keeping racism alive, and attempt to make racism the issue even when it may not be, or isn’t. This does not help anything in my opinion. The sooner this issue goes away, the better, but there are folks who don’t really want it gone.

This picture in this context is two things... ability to inspire and not to inspire. One to lead a nation into cultural revolution, another to revolt. Jesse just didn't get it. Do you?

Took a few months (I've been busy!), but picked up these lyrics today. Did a 1-mic/1-take demo up on my BM player - going the right way on it, or put it back on the shelf? This was only my 3rd run-through of it, so the melody still needs some polishing.

Firebird78 wrote:For Jesse and Al


The Chains

V
Tell them old stories
And how it was wrong
Make sure they remember
It’s never been gone


V
Tell them the mountain
Is so hard to climb
It’s ok to dream, but
It may not be time


Ch
Preserve the fears from long ago
It’s not the same, but don’t let them know
You need to justify the blame
Always remind them……of the chains


V
Live in resentment
No reason to try
The past is their anchor
You keep it alive


Br
They crawl because you tell them they can’t walk
Then you comfort them and say it’s not their fault


Ch
Preserve the fears from long ago
It’s not the same, but don’t let them know
You need to justify the blame
Always remind them…..of the chains
Remind them of the chains

iF Mike does not steal them, I will.. but I guarantee you I will not cheat you out of any income "we" share any income (you and me) the final track generates.. right now I've decided to try a few things to get my UX-2 Toneport functional.. it's back out of the box I'm updating Gear Box to v3.72 (real slow on dial-up) then updating drivers to the Ableton LiveLite5 again will take hours, but the 4 track cassette deck will not cut it for sound quality and I want a good end product to sell for money..

I beat you to it, Dane!

Looking for some feedback on my 1-take demo before I work it further. When I write to other people's lyrics, it doesn't always have the feeling/balls that completely self-written stuff does.

GuitarMikeB wrote:I beat you to it, Dane!

Looking for some feedback on my 1-take demo before I work it further. When I write to other people's lyrics, it doesn't always have the feeling/balls that completely self-written stuff does.

Hey Mike, very cool! I’m glad you could put the lyric to use. It reminds me of something in the style of the band America, or “From the Beginning” by Dokken (I had to look that up, but the song came to my head). I see you added another chorus before the bridge, and it works well I think. You are at 3:10, and it would have been kind of short without doing that. I tend to go with a slower tempo, but styles are different. I am not the greatest at giving song feedback, but I’ll offer what I can.

I think it’s just a matter of experimenting with where you pause (or don’t), and which syllables are accented, until you are the most comfortable with the rhythm and groove. In my head, here’s where I had the accent for lines 2 and 4 in the verses (not showing all accents).

V1
Tell them old stories
And HOW it was WRONG
Make sure they remember
It’s NEver been GONE

V2
Tell them the mountain
Is SO hard to CLIMB
It’s ok to dream, but
It MAY not be TIME

V3
Live in resentment
No REason to TRY
The past is their anchor
You KEEP it aLIVE

I think you are pretty much doing this accept possibly for V2 “SO” and “MAY”. (Just thoughts)

…and just another way to write the bridge and chorus for the pauses……

Br
They crawl
Because you tell them they can’t walk
Then you comfort them
And say it’s not their fault

Ch
Preserve the fears
From long ago
It’s not the same
But don’t let them know

You need to justify the blame
Always remind them
Of the chains

Again, I’m just throwing stuff out there; not that it’s better, or even different than what you are doing in many cases. The best way is where you are the most comfortable in singing it. Any lyric writer is happy to hear someone put the words to music!

If you or anyone needs lyrics, I have a bunch. I do post the lyrics of the (lame) songs I have on Soundclick. I am just a beginner with music, but havin’ a blast with it.

Thanks for listening and the accent tips, we were briefly discussing in a songwriting group meeting last night that when you give a song/lyrics to someone else they can completley change the meaning or feel of it, not knowing what the original writer had in mind.