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Hey whats up everybody, heres a demo of a track i recorded with garageband, my acoustic guitar, and some vocals, any feedback is greatly appreciated i really hope to do something with these songs I know i can come up with!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAZEGFMDOo

There's some noise (guitar movement) in places. And your vocals need a ton of work, you are way off key at times. Keep working at it.

The drum track sucks but I like where you're going with this, the vocals are very ethereal and moody. For a first demo I think you did great but keep working at it.

Hey Fun,

I think it's tough to hold a listener's attention where there are no rhythm changes throughout an entire track... especially one approaching five minutes in length.
I feel that vocally you were going for a Chino from Deftones meets Jonas from Katatonia style (I will give you links to both if you aren't familiar)... I love both bands sound, but only because they have an aggressive band paired up with ambient vocals. Having ambient of both music and vocals just kind of falls flat.
Deftones - Knife Party
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uAP0w51Yjig
Katatonia - Dead Letters
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u79MohYXcl4
Try spicing up that snare drum a little bit, give that track a little life somewhere in it. Good guitar work in it, but give the song as a whole some shine.

hahha did you really just post deftones!!!! Thats awesome!!! Deftones are the baddest band in the world and Im a huge fan!! Just saw them for the 16th time last month!!! I dont know the other band but i'll check it out, and I know the structure isn't what it should be, im tryinig to learn as fast as possible and make the whole song!! Im still finding my voice for a vocal style and I understand and see what your saying about both the music and vocals being really chill how it could fall flat , thanks so much for the feedback you guys, Its really motivating me and getting my seriously excited about it and i think will really help me progress.... seriously thanks guys, im gonna keep working hard at it!!!

Dude listening to the jonas guy and dude you nailed it, holy sh*t man thats awesome!!! How the hell did you hear whats in my head from the little bit of vocals i did record!!! Mind Blown!!! Im gonna check this band out though im really digging it!! Thanks for the new band, and I would love to record vocals over something heavy like that to see what i could come up with , my skills aren't there yet to record my own guitar, bass, and drums along with vocals, Truly inspired and excited, thanks for the fuel you guys!!!

Katatonia has been around since the mid 90's but their sound changed quite a bit around 2005 when The Great Cold Distance came out.
Without a doubt, there are my biggest influence and favorite band over the past decade.
Albums that stand out for me are The Last Fair Deal Gone Down, The Great Cold Distance, Night is the New Day and Dead Letters.

sh*t... ANYONE reading this should be checking those albums out.

well its good stuff for sure the few tracks i listened to!! You seriously made my day though making a comparison to my favorite band of all time, do you listen to dredg, gavin is a big influence on me as well, you might like them

Yes but I only liked Lietmotif and Catch Without Arms... can't stand the new stuff. It's like they forgot how to have balls.
Lietmotif was amazing... I think they actually peaked as a band they and slowly went downhill from there.

Yeah i liked the pariah parrot or whatever its called and the earlier work but i agree the new stuff is pretty bad, the most recent album was realllly bad unfortunatley

funthemental wrote:Hey whats up everybody, heres a demo of a track i recorded with garageband, my acoustic guitar, and some vocals, any feedback is greatly appreciated i really hope to do something with these songs I know i can come up with!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OpAZEGFMDOo

Well,it's a start but I don't know where your going with it.I didn't hear any continuity,and the progression I couldn't follow.vocals dragged a bit too much for me,and I wanted to myself on a ledge.Hey! it's a start.

sh*t man its so sad and upsetting, speaking of deftones chi Cheng passed away today, rip chi!!!!

jimmydanger wrote:The drum track sucks but I like where you're going with this, the vocals are very ethereal and moody. For a first demo I think you did great but keep working at it.

I agree with Jimmy, I'm a fan of the concept. Could use a real drummer, but the guitar patterns are gorgeous and I like what you're doing with the vocals. A little more work on a mastered product and I'd say you've got a song with the makings of greatness in it. =)

Thanks for the kind words and motivation you guys, I work on it almost every night and its starting to really morph and become something great!!! your guys support and positive feedback really motivates me !!!

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YzM96KhCnGo

I'm still trying to find my sound a bit but I'm getting much more comfortable with my voice what do you guys think?

funthemental wrote:http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=YzM96KhCnGo

I'm still trying to find my sound a bit but I'm getting much more comfortable with my voice what do you guys think?

you might be intending to rest your vocals on the upper shelf (falsetta even in the lower registers), but I'm wondering if using your natural voice when you speak (power center) might give a little more clarity.

I'd recommend purchasing the Zen of Screaming to learn a little more about your voice and how to control / project. The title of the DVD is a little misplaced I think - although it IS geared for rocker / metal singers, it does explain the mechanics of projecting with a lot of examples and exercises that can be applied to strengthening your real voice.

An Eddie Vedder range might come accross better in the vocal department for your style - granted not many people have his natural tone, but I think a natural voice sounds better than a falsetto voice.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nttU4KbcC-A&feature=kp