Musician Forum - Band Discussion Board - BandMix

She has potential with the instrument but is still a novice. My band is DESPERATE for a bass player and she is the only one with a bass and a amp in the area. The only problem is I have a hard time getting her inspired to play. I told her that she could be like Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols (who couldn't really play) and then improve over time. Sean Yseult of White Zombie is a perfect example of a girlfriend whom the other members gave a bass to and said "just play". Eventually Sean got really good.

Anyway my girlfriend gets discouraged real easily and she can't afford bass lessons but she has a good enough bass and amp to play shows and she's at my house a few times a week so her being able to play would be a big advantage as she's around often enough anyway so getting to practice wouldn't be hard. What can I do any suggestions?

Oh yeah one more thing she's going to collage and has a job. She says those things eat up alot of her time but can she work around it?

All she needs is the desire. The hardest part of music is just doing it. Musicians are the coolest people on the planet. How can she not want to be a part of that? Have her send me a message...I'll give her some encouragement.

I have mixed feelings about this. My girlfriend and I met when she joined our band. So, she was already a musician. But, I did a brief bandmate exchange a few months ago (you play drums for me, I'll play bass for you) with a group who's bassist was going to undergo surgery and would be laid up for several months. The bassist was the drummers girlfriend. She looked like she she DID NOT want to be there anyway. I mentioned this to her and she confirmed that it was the drummer's idea, who pressured her into it.

So, although I may push my girlfriend a little to get back in the game, she was already in the game when we met. It would do us both a lot of good.
But, trying to make someone into something they're not just seems counter-productive to me. No one's happy.
But, the Sid Vicious idea ain't so bad. She was terrible. My girlfriend had a similar player in her old band once. They would just turn the person's volume waaaay down.

If she aoin't got the "wanna," then "convincing" her to do it would be a disservice both to her AND your band.

Have you tried hypnosis?

philbymon wrote:If she aoin't got the "wanna," then "convincing" her to do it would be a disservice both to her AND your band.

Have you tried hypnosis?

Yeah I suppose that's true it's just really hard to find bass players where I live.

I was teaching a singer to play base while she sang. I showed her 3 two finger positions that would allow her to play any simple three chord song as a start. I had her singing and playing bass within two hours. I couldn't believe how fast she was able to hear the changes after an hour or so.

The next day I made up charts for every key and simple fingering positions so she could learn all the fingering positions for all the basic chords. I worked on it for hours.
When I was done I called her and told her that I had made up some charts, and that if she spent as little as 15 minutes a day on them she would be able to play with most bands around here.

Her response was you don't tell me I have to practice. Nobody tells me what to do. So I told her to she was a belligerent as$ and as far as I was concerned she could go f&^% herself and get another teacher.

Later on I bought her bass and still use it when I record. I love that bass. She ended up going with a friend of mine who said she could star in his band.

Good luck with that. She sings a bit off key in every song she sings. So if you have any sort of relationship, don't even bother. It'll go south in a heartbeat.

Get someone else to play teacher.

You don't. She has a job and goes to school and puts up with you? That's plenty. If you can't find a bass player why don't you play bass and find a guitar player?

Tom, ask your girlfriend if you can borrow her gear so that you can find someone else who wants to play (beginner or not).

If your new bass player gets good enough, then it's a matter of accumulating equipment for him/her.

If your girlfriend decides she really wants to play, then you end up with two available bass players.

One cannot instill desire into another.

give her a ring

Thomas,

Show her this video. If she still has no interest in playing, there is no hope.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yuZ-J5c ... re=related

TheJohnny7Band wrote:Thomas,

Show her this video. If she still has no interest in playing, there is no hope.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yuZ-J5c ... re=related

Wow that girl is good also never realized just how good Jeff Beck was!

celticpiping wrote:give her a ring

That's the last thing you want to do other than getting her pregnant. Personally I would NEVER have a girlfriend or WORSE a wife in my band. The emotional garbage that may be transmitted to the rest of the band can be toxic. If she WEREN'T your girlfriend I would make MORE of an attempt to teach her the bass. I've been involved with a few band members whose girlfriends/wives had too much influence on those members. Call me chauvinistic (I'm not) but I'm leery about girlfriend/wife band involvement. After some of the crap I've been through I'm sticking with the guys thank you...

TheJohnny7Band wrote:Thomas,

Show her this video. If she still has no interest in playing, there is no hope.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0yuZ-J5c ... re=related

H*ll that makes me want to play bass.

Slacker G wrote:I was teaching a singer to play base while she sang. I showed her 3 two finger positions that would allow her to play any simple three chord song as a start. I had her singing and playing bass within two hours. I couldn't believe how fast she was able to hear the changes after an hour or so.

The next day I made up charts for every key and simple fingering positions so she could learn all the fingering positions for all the basic chords. I worked on it for hours.
When I was done I called her and told her that I had made up some charts, and that if she spent as little as 15 minutes a day on them she would be able to play with most bands around here.

Her response was you don't tell me I have to practice. Nobody tells me what to do. So I told her to she was a belligerent as$ and as far as I was concerned she could go f&^% herself and get another teacher.

Later on I bought her bass and still use it when I record. I love that bass. She ended up going with a friend of mine who said she could star in his band.

Good luck with that. She sings a bit off key in every song she sings. So if you have any sort of relationship, don't even bother. It'll go south in a heartbeat.

Get someone else to play teacher.

This is why Cisco won't teach guitar. He gets asked all the time and he puts all this work into organizing the lessons and whatnot and people bail after the first couple of lessons. Now when people ask him, he asks for them to pre-pay the first 10 lessons up front.

Chaeya