Musician Forum - Band Discussion Board - BandMix

The Farleys have been auditioning drummers and we now have to make a tough decision. David came over last week; very enthusiastic, loves our style of music, studied his parts, played with a steady tempo, but not the strongest drummer I've played with by any stretch. Mike came over last night; excellent drummer, did his homework, but has never really played our style before. But he loved ours tunes and had a great time. In between I called our former drummer Mark who we let go due to substance abuse. He says he's getting his life together and wants to return to the band. I'm leaning towards Mike (who doesn't drink or smoke) but the other guys want Mark back because he knows all of the material and is a great drummer when sober. Any advice?

If the substance abuse has been a continuing problem in the past it could be a problem in the future. You can alway's get someone up to speed and they can learn their parts. I have the opininion that once someone in the band shows their true colors they are not likely to change. If I were in your shoes I would have to move forward with my search for a replacement. Once you make a decision to replace him it is not a good idea to go backwards move forward and be picky and patient. Down here in Texas we have a saying "plan your work and work your plan" I hope you find what you are looking for.

Thanks Guys, I know you're right. The problem is he was our drummer from 2001 to 2009 and became a good friend. His gf is an evil bitch, and he started going downhill after meeting her (crack, hillbilly heroin?). If he could get away from her he might have a chance.

Do you think he would leave her for the band? Not likely.

It's like our guitarist - the drunk. Now he has a new gf who won't allow him to drink. He told us she'd be gone for ten days, during which time he expects to "lay around drunk the whole time." (He's had 3 DUI's in a 4-month period, & missed a gig cuz of it...do ya think we can depend on him, when he talks like that?)

Some of his old habits may change (he tunes his axe, now, for example...sorta), but some of them will always stay the same (like getting to the gig 1/2 before we go on...not helping others during the loading/unloading process), whether he still uses or not.

Can you live with it, either way?

People can change but only when they really want to. I almost wish I hadn't called him now. We would have to have a band meeting and lay it all on the line first: if you show up wasted you will be fired on the spot.

Never trust a junkie!

KLUGMO wrote:Junkie is pretty harsh Hayden.
He is a human being with a problem.

Addicts are, generally speaking, too much trouble to work with, once they pass that thin line of being productive & useful. Crossing back over into "normal" territory is way too hard for the majority who've gone down that far.

Too often, there are trust issues that should never have been had in the first place. A band should never hafta worry about a member showing up for a gig, & being able to perform, for example. Once that line is crossed, it's all too easy to repeat the problem, for the addict, & it's way too hard to trust him again, for the band. It becomes a bad scene all around for everyone involved.

If second & third chances are given, and betrayed, there is no "helping" the offender. We're musicians, not babysitters or psychologists. We need ppl we can trust & rely upon. When we can't, it's time to move on.

When I'm mad at a substance abuser, I call 'em a junky, cuz junky = addict.

No sense being nice about it if it's pissing you off.

I have a lot of friends, some of whom drink to excess on occasion, or get high, but none of them are ppl I can't rely on. You can't rely on a junky...or an addict, if you prefer.

You can only be polite so long, & then ya lose it. Many of us here have had to deal with these types of problems ro the point that we're fed up before we even start.

You gotta understand that.

Mike seems to me, is the best bet. Good luck.

Thanks J and everyone, sincerely. Mike does seem like the best drummer for our situation. We'll be making our decision and I'll be sure to update this thread.