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Now I know what a bull-rider feels like...

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 3:59 am
by fisherman bob
My son had a terrible head-banging tantrum at his day-care place. He's autistic, 23 years old and has super-human strength. They called me up to come get him, I happened to be close by and raced through two traffic lights. It took all my strength, and two others, to get him out of the building into my car. Along the way he head-butted me about ten times, nearly broke my cheekbone and jaw (not sure if in fact it IS broken). The joys of guinea pig prescription drugs. Oh well, we'll try another regimen starting tomorrow. Maybe he'll end up like a zombie and not bother anybody else. That's what the doctors and care providers want.... so much for his liver and digestion...

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 4:05 am
by gbheil
So sorry to hear you having these troubles Bob.
Your a good and strong father to deal with this the way you do.
You may not think it special.
But you are a hero ! And don't you forget it either.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 7:48 am
by philbymon
Good grief, bob. Why do they find it so necessary to keep changing the drugs? Because they lose efficacy after awhile. The time is past to ask about alternatives to the brain drug approach, imho.

Still, you gotta do what you must in these situations. It must seem like you're between a rock & a hard place when these events arise. I feel for ya, man.

Hope your bones aren't' broken or bruised.

It's tough on your son, too.

I'm praying for you both, blues man. Good luck.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 2:54 pm
by Starfish Scott
I can relate a little.

I used to teach this young woman who has something similar, that is until she attacked me and tried to pull out my right eye.

I immediately used a pressure point on her and she stopped and apologized.

It didn't change my mind though. I had to quit that job, as they didn't seem to think that it was important. I, on the other hand, felt like my eye had her finger prints on it yet.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 6:52 pm
by gtZip
Does he understand that it hurts people when he head butts them?
Does he know that it is wrong to do that?

PostPosted: Wed Feb 17, 2010 6:59 pm
by Kramerguy
gtZip wrote:Does he understand that it hurts people when he head butts them?
Does he know that it is wrong to do that?


Quite frankly, he doesn't, Zip. Autism is amazingly difficult to understand or explain.


Bob, how is he without ANY medication?

Me and the wife are anti-med, we only keep emergency seizure and other medications, but the ONLY pill my daughter takes daily is her flintstones vitamin. I'm guessing one day things will change, but I'm curious when your doctors started him on the drugs, why they have to keep changing the regiment (fishing for answers?), and how he is when he's off the drugs.

Sorry you had a rough day.

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 2:39 am
by fisherman bob
gtZip wrote:Does he understand that it hurts people when he head butts them?
Does he know that it is wrong to do that?
You don't understand autism. Knowing something is wrong and being able to control yourself is impossible for autistic people. My son is obsessive-compulsive in the extreme. If in his mind it's time to do something and we don't do it there's hell to pay. If his routine (in his mind) is not followed then there's hell to pay. There's a huge spectrum of disorders in autism. Sometimes it's hearing, sometimes sense of smell, etc. I believe my son has acute hearing and it overwhelms him. My wife swears he can hear my car approaching our house from ten miles away. He listens to conversations all around us. If a person is scolding a child a hundred feet away and my son hears it he thinks she is scolding HIM. Some autistic people cannot separate themselves from other people. They don't know what "I" or "me" means. They think that "I" includes everybody else in the area. Their logic is completely foreign to everybody else's logic. It's hard for me to explain this (I'm no scientist by any means) but I've lived it. To the unitiated my son is VERY SCARY. After living with him for 23 years some of his reactions still surprise me. Somehow we have to go with the flow and accomodate him. Kind of like what do you do with a 500 lb gorilla, just about anything he wants.

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 2:42 am
by fisherman bob
Kramerguy, my son could not survive without meds at this point. His obsessive-compulsive behavior is so acute he would be totally unmanageable without it, as well as his seizures. It's a shame that he's hooked on meds. My wife is a strong believer in prescription meds, I AM NOT. But at this point he would have to be in an institution without the meds. All we can do is at this point hope there's somehow a cure found for autism. I'm not holding my breath on that...

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 3:05 am
by ANGELSSHOTGUN
My God Bob , You are a hero, may God bless you with the strength you and your family need.

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 4:12 am
by Kramerguy
fisherman bob wrote: All we can do is at this point hope there's somehow a cure found for autism. I'm not holding my breath on that...


From what I know, it's incurable. I think a "solution" will someday be found, but we both know that's not the same thing as a cure.

I hope I'm wrong.

I'm really sorry to hear that meds are a necessary part of his life. I've NEVER read anything good about autistics and meds.. EVER.

People praise me and tell me what a trooper I am, but I've got NOTHING on what you have to deal with in one day. My hat goes off to you.

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 1:33 pm
by philbymon
Damn, man. It has to be physically exhausting as well as mentally draining. You must be one heck of a guy, bob. I respect you like I do few others, man, for the love you must have in spite of all the difficulties. You are something else.

I really hope things settle down for you, your wife & son. Is he your only child?

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 5:02 pm
by fisherman bob
philbymon wrote:Damn, man. It has to be physically exhausting as well as mentally draining. You must be one heck of a guy, bob. I respect you like I do few others, man, for the love you must have in spite of all the difficulties. You are something else.

I really hope things settle down for you, your wife & son. Is he your only child?
Yeah, my only child, that's enough for me. We weren't even supposed to be able to have children, so he's been a blessing to us despite his problems. Lucky for me I'm a strong man myself, both physically and mentally. I had an older brother (R.I.P. bro) who had problems that dwarf my sons problems. He was 250 to 300 lbs at various times in his life and it was nothing for me to throw him around like a sack of potatoes when I had to. When it's your own blood you have to deal with you just deal with it, you would do the same as me. We tried a trial residency with my son about eight years ago (when he was much smaller than today) at the leading institution in Kansas. After only three days they told us to come get him, he was too much for the workers to deal with. I made up my mind then that I had to keep him home at all costs. If the "experts" can't handle him I just have to until I'm not able to any more (hopefully many years from now)...

PostPosted: Thu Feb 18, 2010 10:54 pm
by gbheil
In my profession I see too many whom are too selfish or too weak to " deal " blood or not. Perhaps you don't feel feel like what you do is special.
But I guaran-damn- ty you, it makes you special in my book.

PostPosted: Fri Feb 19, 2010 2:32 am
by fisherman bob
sanshouheil wrote:In my profession I see too many whom are too selfish or too weak to " deal " blood or not. Perhaps you don't feel feel like what you do is special.
But I guaran-damn- ty you, it makes you special in my book.
Thanks.