Musician Forum - Band Discussion Board - BandMix

Hey, JR,
It kind of sounds like he's a 'taker,' and not a 'giver,' huh?
If he finds he can't manipulate you, will he eventually give the time needed to re-locate his drum set?

what's his vehicle situation? He might not want to impose on anyone.

I hate to say it, but since you are being played, and it sounds like something you really want to do, maybe you should become the player.
Why don't you suggest a get together at his house and then from there say, let's go back to my place and record that, it sounded awesome! This way everyone is on board and he will look like the Debbie Downer of the group if he doesn't participate. Since it is so close, he should jump on and maybe other people will be willing to help him with his stuff.... Also, he may need to be remotivated, which could come from hearing you guys play together again.

I know, I know manipulation from a woman... expected, right? Well I hate to be that way, but I have plenty of semi motivated friends who have a lot of talent in different ways and I am constantly having to come up with creative ways to help them explore their talents.

Just my 2 cents worth. Take it or leave, but I hope it all works out for you in the end.

Sounds like a drummer I had a few years back. He was serious about playing accept when it came to taking his stuff to a gig he would piss and moan about it. So the rest of the guys in the band would help him, then it was it takes me weeks to get the drums to where I like them on the floor., Then I came up with this solution put a piece of carpet on the floot find where you like the kit to sit then make the carpet and name the spots on the carpet the part of the kit. then his cymbles were not right I told him to mark the height on those as well... Well it was the Raiders are on and can't play tonight "Paid Gig at that which I had to return the deposit" so that was the last straw for me I gave him my keys to the place we were jamming and said good luck on your seriousness "NOT" and finding people that are willing to put up with just about everything you come up with.

I have had enought of people saying one thing and then not wanting to follow threw with it. If this guy is just to lazy to move some hollow wood and skins and thinks you should move solid amps and gear then he is not worth it at all. I would let him know hey man things are sounding good but I can not keep bringing my gear over here.. I have a studio and a ton more gear at my place. If that don't work then move on..

Fenix

By the time I read this entire forum I could have hired a new drummer and been giggin! Move on bro, wasteing time on him only holds you back, not him. Good luck though in future drummers.

any cat dont wanna give his 100% soul to the band....dump him......yes some responsiblities do pop up but in the long run.....seems to me he's just playin ya........wonder how many bands he's done this too....keep at it dude..........

Stevebygodsmith has it down brother.

Bands are fragile the day you start em. You GOTTA be on the lookout for anything shaky, and be ready to move on.

Thats why I moved to a two piece and I play the DRUMS as well as the piano, sometimes simultaneously, and its better than having to trust someone meerly to come over.

When you get the right mix of guys. The following happens.

1. Your inseperable
2. The music always comes first
3. You can tell each other to piss off and then write a song about it later.
4. The food or beer tab is evenly distributed.

And if you got one guy that is not sharing in the food and beer tab but always puts music first. . . .he's the talented one of the group, and you should just let him be his essentric non paying self.

Give him an honest talking to and ask him why. He might just not be good at talking unsolicited and you may be surprised what you find out if you merely. . . .ask.

Big Papi
www.bitguys.com
www.ipapentertainment.com
www. myspace.com/bigivoryticklers

This guy wants to enjoy music on his terms, but is not willing to sacrifice for it. That doesn't work for those of us who LIVE it. What happens when his excuses graduate to missing real gigs? Better to move on now. Find someone dependable and committed now, or you will regret it down the road, and it is hard to rebuild trust among fans and clubs.

Gotta watch out for those drummers