General Music Chat

I'm a blonde so I can get away with this,,,,,

A blonde heard most car accidents happen within a mile of home,,,,,

So he/she moved.

HAPPY NOW?

Q: Why was the bass player arrested?

A: Because he got in treble


.

What do you get when a musican falls into a cave with a pick-axe

A miner!


WHere did they find Beethoven's last movement...

On the Piano bench!

If you had purchased $1,000 of Nortel stock a year ago, it would now be worth $49. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5 left. if you had bought $1,000 of Delta Airlines stock you'd have $49 left. With United Airlines, you would have nothing left. But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank it and then turned in the cans for recycling, you would have $214. The best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. it is called the 401-Keg Plan.

If you had purchased $1,000 of Nortel stock a year ago, it would now be worth $49. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1,000. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5 left. if you had bought $1,000 of Delta Airlines stock you'd have $49 left. With United Airlines, you would have nothing left. But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank it and then turned in the cans for recycling, you would have $214. The best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle. it is called the 401-Keg Plan.

Nice! I am stealing this.

I'm a blonde so I can get away with this,,,,,

A blonde heard most car accidents happen within a mile of home,,,,,

So he/she moved.

HAPPY NOW?

Why did the blonde have square boobs?

Because she forgot to take the kleenex out of the box.

A BLOND confronts her husband on his CHEATING WAYS.

As she points a gun to her head she says,,,,,

Don't laugh you bastard,,, you are next.

that's it, bro!




Here is some funny sheet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=p ... SbxBQhzk3M

Funny stuff Yod,,, The bottom line is I see a bunch of stupid people seeking protection from the basic fact that they already given up all their rights.

REALLY SAD.

WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU DROP A PIANO DOWN A MINE SHAFT????

































A Flat Minor

How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb?


3




One to hold the bulb and two, to turn the ladder.

YOD, you started a bad bad thing here.

These are posted on the songwriters site I belong to, maybe some will enjoy:


A bass player's son wants to learn bass. The first day he teaches him all the notes on the first string. The send day he teaches him all the notes on the third string. The third day his son tells him he can't take the lesson because he has a gig



What do you call a musician with a car?

A Thief



How do you know when your stage is level?? The drummer has drool coming out of both sides of his mouth


How to you get a lead singer to the gig on time?
Break his mirrors



If there's a band playing in the forest, and there's no club owner around, are they still too loud?



Q. What's the difference between a banjo player and a municipal bond?

A. The bond will eventually mature and earn money



What do you call a successful musician?
A guy whose wife/girlfriend has 2 jobs


What's the difference between a pizza and a drummer? ......A pizza can feed a family of four


Musicians are very tempermental.... half temper and half mental



Little boy:- When I grow up I want to be a guitarist

Mom:- Look son, you can't do both


Q:What do you call a dead drummer
A:Out of time

how many guitar player dose it take to change a light blub?

5











one to do it and four to say " I could do that"



what is the definition of perfect pitch





tossing a banjo in the trash can without hitting the rim.

What do you call a lead singer without a GF?


HOMELESS!