The very week they started selling these damned "FSC" cigarettes, my ears went cafflooey. Then my friends started having problems, too. Now they're telling my wife she has asthma.
"Coincidence," you might say. Bullspit! I am so sure that this is the spark that exasperated my weakened ear condition, caused Dddonnie's bronchitis, Mike's new sinus problems, & my wife's asthma. It seems to have hit all of us at the very moment these frikken things were foisted on us.
You mark my words - these f*ckin' things are way worse than any real, regular cigarette, &, like I predicted many years ago, they're forcing me to quit through nefarious means, the bastards!
They don't stop fires, either, as my recent experience in my office proves.
They are awfuly hard to keep lit, though, so you hafta smoke faster & suck harder to keep them going, which oughta keep the ciggy manufacturers happy.
I've come to the conclusion that nobody is ever gonna leave well enough alone around here, & it's pissing me off to the point that I'm ready for a whole new environment. Costa Rica, anyone? Maybe I'll just go be an illegal in Mexico. THAT would serve 'em right!!!!'
Guess I'm gonna hafta grow my own tobacco now. I'm picking up a pair of breeder rabbits tomorrow, & with the deer I keep getting & the pigs I get from the Mennonites, I should be nearly free of female hormones soon.
Now all I gotta do is figger out how to fake getting the flu vaccine, cuz I SURELY don't want to actually get it, & I don't wanna go to jail, either!
Do I seem a lil paranoid to you?

"Coincidence," you might say. Bullspit! I am so sure that this is the spark that exasperated my weakened ear condition, caused Dddonnie's bronchitis, Mike's new sinus problems, & my wife's asthma. It seems to have hit all of us at the very moment these frikken things were foisted on us.
You mark my words - these f*ckin' things are way worse than any real, regular cigarette, &, like I predicted many years ago, they're forcing me to quit through nefarious means, the bastards!
They don't stop fires, either, as my recent experience in my office proves.
They are awfuly hard to keep lit, though, so you hafta smoke faster & suck harder to keep them going, which oughta keep the ciggy manufacturers happy.
I've come to the conclusion that nobody is ever gonna leave well enough alone around here, & it's pissing me off to the point that I'm ready for a whole new environment. Costa Rica, anyone? Maybe I'll just go be an illegal in Mexico. THAT would serve 'em right!!!!'
Guess I'm gonna hafta grow my own tobacco now. I'm picking up a pair of breeder rabbits tomorrow, & with the deer I keep getting & the pigs I get from the Mennonites, I should be nearly free of female hormones soon.
Now all I gotta do is figger out how to fake getting the flu vaccine, cuz I SURELY don't want to actually get it, & I don't wanna go to jail, either!
Do I seem a lil paranoid to you?

SMILE - it's the safest way to spread your cheeks!